Free UK Delivery Over £40
What is BDSM. History, myths and where to start?

What is BDSM. History, myths and where to start?

History of BDSM

The BDSM culture dates back to the time of ancient Greece, India, the Roman Empire, etc., proof of which are the frescoes, letters, and other artifacts found in the excavations that testify that even then, people were beaten not only as punishment , but also for their own pleasure, and - voluntarily.

Over time, it grew into a full-fledged practice, and then into a culture that today finds more and more of its admirers, whose number is growing every day.  Many admirers of BDSM and among the "stars" who are not alien to anything human, but in one of their interviews, Ryan said about this. 
In other words, sexual role-playing games, where domination and submission are manifested, is a very ordinary and natural phenomenon of today.

BDSM Myths and Reality

Myth 1. All adherents of BDSM, mentally unhealthy people.

Reality. Not at all! According to a study conducted by one of the reputable European universities, people practicing such relationships are most stress-resistant, friendly, active, open, and feel happy in life. Moreover, very often occupy leadership positions. Great family people.

Myth 2. Everything is forced.

Reality. No no and one more time no! In fact, this is a theater, and all the actions in it take place according to a pre-negotiated scenario, where everyone plays a role, having previously familiarised themselves with it. 

In addition, even when the master whips a handcuffed “slave,” both enjoy it. One is physical and the other is moral. Although, to some subordinates or submissives, the right lashes also give physical pleasure.

Myth 3. Only men can be dominant.

Reality. In fact, according to statistics, women most often become dominant. The reason is pretty clear - role exchange. A strong-willed man wants to know what it's like to be in the "skin" of a woman, and she wants to command a strong sex even in bed. 

Although, as a rule, the inclination to a particular role is innate, because of which everyone finds his place, in accordance with his inherent inclinations - to command, or to obey.

Myth 4. BDSM is dangerous.

Reality. Everything can be dangerous, people even choke on a cherry if they eat not at the table, but on the run. So this is all nonsense. 

Firstly, all accessories available in a sex shop are as safe as possible, as they are made of the most suitable materials for this and have a well-thought-out design. 

For example, a leather collar can be equipped with an additional soft padding inside, and steel handcuffs covered with fur so as not to damage the wrists. 

Of course, for more advanced players in this matter, everything is much more serious, but in any case, no one uses a splinter board or a cord from the grandmother's refrigerator to fix the partner for slapping on the pope. 

Also, there are stop words or stop signs with which the lower one can signal that the game needs to be stopped.

Myth 5. All adherents of this culture walk in black leather and are quite aggressive.

Reality. This is nothing more than fiction and a promoted stereotype. Of course, as a rule, black leather and steel are a real classic in such outfits, however, this is not limited to this, especially, as a rule, this does not go beyond the door of a bedroom or other place for practice.

Moreover, going into a sex shop , you can find many role-playing costumes that are ideally suited for these purposes in white or even pink colors, in the form of a hare or a cute cat.

Woman in suit whip

 

BDSM terms and tools

First of all, it is worth sorting out the letters. BDSM stands for "bondage" and "BDSM", naturally implying domination and submission. 

And all other accessories that correspond to this and which are offered by a sex shop help to create the necessary atmosphere, surroundings, image, and of course, carry out certain actions.

The master (lord, master, dominate, etc.) as a rule has a formidable and impressive appearance, and his face can be hidden under a mask so that emotions are not visible. 

Its attributes are objects for the implementation of punishments, such as whip , flogger , clamps and others. 

He also manages the process of bondage or fixation, using shackles , handcuffs , special machines or even ropes for this .

A slave (sub, submissive, lower, subordinate) in most cases has a collar , which is a vivid testimony of his subordinate position, and even serves as a symbol. 

In the case of a mask , it can be open or closed, or even have a gag .

In light versions, role-playing games can be accompanied by playing suits , bright handcuffs , and light whisk-panicles .

BDSM Basics or Where to Start

First of all, stepping on the path of BDSM, you should not force events, and understand that you need to enter the water from a shallow place. 

Also, it is better to understand this philosophy by talking to practicing people or reading a book on this topic. 

Next, you need to decide on a partner to whom what role impresses (what is most interesting, they can be changed for a change), and outline the line of what is permitted. 

Recall that here everything happens voluntarily. Even violence or humiliation!

Further, it will not be superfluous to create at least a common scenario, and it is better to learn about each other's fantasies. 

Maybe someone wants to be a helpful dog, someone an obedient slave, and someone just to be spanked for being guilty. 

Well, you can even arrange a whole theater, with a change of actions and a whole plot worthy of becoming a classic. The main thing is not to be shy about your desires and fantasies.

The next thing to do is purchase the appropriate BDSM accessories . 

What they will be, depends on you and on your desires. Moreover, modern sex shop galore offers everything that you might need. 

Starting from intimate jewelry, ending with strict collars and whips . Well, the options for outfits simply can not be counted. 

And it will not be superfluous to pay attention to sets or sets of different levels, in which everything is there, to immerse yourself in this interesting and full of new pleasures world.

After the first time, you should talk heart-to-heart with your partner, sincerely tell and listen carefully to what someone liked best and what was not. 

Share realizations and new fantasies. Well, then, if everyone liked everything, continue to follow this path and not stop in their experiments.

 

Woman tied

Should I try BDSM?

The answer is simple - we believe that it is better to try than later to regret that I did not. 

But, nevertheless, this is a personal matter for everyone. The main thing to remember is that BDSM is neither a circle, nor a party, nor an organization, or even less a sect. 

This is just a style of sex life and nothing more. Accordingly, you do not owe anything to anyone, and nobody will drive you there with a whip . The matter is purely voluntary. 

So if there is a desire, buy a mask , a whip , put a collar on your beloved husband , and turn the night into a performance full of pleasures for everyone, then God will help! 

And who knows, maybe in this you will find yourself, and you will understand that this is precisely what you did not have enough for complete happiness in family life.

 

What are menstrual cups and how to use them?

What does clitoris look like and where to find it?

Popular intimate haircuts. History and advice